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Sunday, March 6, 2011

End of my rope...


Ever feel like you are at "the end of your rope" so to speak? Yeah, lately I'm feeling like I've been hanging from a cliff like in the picture. Things feel so whacked out and uncertain in my life. I struggle with where I am, and where God wants me to be - Does He want me to do school next year? Is He going to show me the ministry He wants me to do soon? Is there something else I should be doing? Should I get a job next year? Should I move out? Where would I move? And HOW AM I GOING TO GET THROUGH NEXT WEEK????

I'm burnt out - my arms are tired from hanging there for so long. My mind and body are shot from trying to do so much - to much homework - to much to remember - to much to do, and not enough time to do it in.

I love my Deaf studies, but at the same time if God showed me a ministry which I could serve at I would probably drop school like a hot potato. Drop my whole current life in fact.

There is so much in my life I would love to do - especially to become a missionary, but lately I have been wishing I could like live on a big farm with a family who has lots of kids, and just LIVE for a while! A lady from our church spoke of maybe becoming entrepreneurs and living on a farm in the fairly close future, and it just made me think about that! I would love that. :-)

I am worn out. Worn out from school. Worn out from homework and studying. Worn out from having a messy house all the time that I honestly can't do anything about (if I clean it it will be messy again in one hour). WORN OUT FROM LIFE!!

Looking forward to my Bible study tonight with HannahBeth! <3 And God is always SO good! He is leading me, even when I feel like I'm just hanging there - He is holding me up!!!! :-)

2 comments:

Enchanted said...

Ughhh, I hear you! Life right now just seems so....blech. Hard to get through! But you're right, God is leading, and He's always good! <3

I would love to live on a farm too oneday. hehe! ;)

Cathie said...

*big hugs*
Jeremiah 29:11 - 'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'

I'm sure God has something wonderful in store for you.. <3